When someone walks slower than me: omfg your slow ass is clogging up the hallway for the rest of us put some pep in your step grandma

When someone walks faster than me: jesus christ are you on the run from the police this isn't a race you can tone it down usain bolt

When someone walks at the same pace as me: who gave your creepy ass permission to walk with me get the fuck away before I call the cops

"the buddhists say if you meet somebody and your heart pounds, your hands shake, your knees go weak, that’s not the one. when you meet your ‘soul mate’ you’ll feel calm. no anxiety, no agitation"
- (via sadtampon)

(Source: psych-facts, via staytrue-to-you)


Billy Memes here!  Are today’s memes just not cutting it in your busy 21st-century life?  Well, don’t fear, world, because we’ve got a brand new meme just for you!  Try Oxy-Meme today for all your meme/meme-related needs.  So easy to use it doesn’t even need explaining!  Remember, when your world is feeling a little meme-empty, just add Oxy-Meme to spice up your everyday life!

(via ironic-straightwhitemale)


do u ever miss a friend but u don’t want to tell them bc they’re probably doing perfectly fine without u and to them it probably doesn’t even matter and so u don’t want them to think ur annoying or needy

(via plaidapus)